


I Could Love You (The Way You Want To Be)

by hovercraft



Category: Fate/Grand Order, Fate/stay night & Related Fandoms
Genre: (from being temporarily a vampire it's not explicit but here's a warning anyway), Blood Drinking, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, M/M, One Shot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-10
Updated: 2020-08-14
Packaged: 2020-11-28 19:15:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,954
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20971652
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hovercraft/pseuds/hovercraft
Summary: Arthur's got an embarrassing crush and so does Gilgamesh. Too bad it's not mutual and embarrassing for different reasons.(A collection of Gilthur drabbles set in Chaldea. Sporadically updated.)





	1. i've got a crush (on you) (G)

i.

He just wishes he knew why he was drawn to him.

Fundamentally, there’s no reason. His female counterpart can’t stand Gilgamesh, and yet, instead of ever looking Arthur’s way, that’s where his affections lie. He never gives Arthur a passing glance in the hallways, he only refers to him as ‘that man with the holy sword (who) vanquishes big beasts’. Arthur wishes he’d start hating Gilgamesh the same way Artoria does, but after being on rayshift after rayshift together, Arthur is only growing more attracted to him. It wasn’t like this with _his Gilgamesh_, who was a pain in the arse at best. This man is similar but different at the same time—there’s a way he carries himself that’s… less childish, with even more bravado.

Arthur swallows down his crush and vows never to mention it. He has no place getting close to anyone in this universe anyway.

ii.

It’s hard, though.

They rarely exchange words except to talk about their master, and Arthur doesn’t fumble his words like he thinks he will. He has to remind himself ‘eyes up—it doesn’t matter that he’s not wearing a shirt’ whenever he’s without his armor. His heart is beating furiously when he looks at him, and it’s very good that he keeps his hood up around him. Gilgamesh is smart, he could spot the look in his eyes a mile away… or so Arthur thinks, because he never does. He’s just _lavishing attention on every other version of himself but him_. Even the Santa Rider gets his most devout attention, which Arthur thinks is just cruel. ‘_None of them even like you the way I like you!’_

‘The way I like you’, oh no, that’s such a dangerous path. The only person who knows is Da Vinci, who’s Chaldea’s self-professed-and-constantly-proven genius. She connected the dotted lines between Arthur’s eyes and the back of Gilgamesh’s head as he brags about another successful conquest in the training simulator and saw the imaginary hearts over Arthur’s head. It’s cute, but she tells him it’s a little sad to watch. One king head over heels for another, while he gives all the attention to his other selves… isn’t there someone else in Chaldea he likes the same way? No? Well… hang in there, buddy.

Arthur tries not to think about it. Even when they brush shoulders in the hallway, Arthur forces himself to ignore the electric touch between them that never seems to happen with anyone else. He completely gets why Artoria hates him yet is insanely jealous of the attention she gets. Arthur could be just as romantic back, he could, but he doesn’t even know if these emotions would ever reach Gilgamesh quite the same way. That is—if he only wants a girl.

Arthur finds himself wanting to say something more and more as the days go on, but if Gilgamesh hasn’t noticed him now, would he ever?

iii.

“You were excellent out there,” Arthur says to Gilgamesh as they wind up another battle.

“You seemed distracted. That’s not like you.” Gilgamesh responds evenly. “Care to tell me why?”

Arthur swallows. It was up to him to take down the giant boar while Gilgamesh dealt with the smaller enemies, and naturally, he wound up staring at Gilgamesh longer than his window was open and took a decent hit for it. His armor is askew and one of the straps has been ripped through. It was a shameful thing, to be staring at someone while enamored and take such a beating.

“I was keeping an eye on Master.”

“Were you?”

“I was.”

“Hmm… interesting,” but Gilgamesh doesn’t force Arthur to answer any more, and Arthur wishes he would, because maybe their bloody non-existent relationship would get somewhere. Deep down, he knows it’s pathetic to wait for someone else to make the move instead of doing it himself, but Gilgamesh’s laugh cuts deep, and he’s not sure if he can handle it being directed at him.

“Arthur, I want to make a deal with you.”

“Yes?”

“Pretend to court me.”

“--!” Arthur’s heart skipped a beat. “Wh—what? What are you talking about?”

Gilgamesh leaned in. “You’re the only version of Saber that does not reject me outright. I figure if she sees you being affectionate with me, she might reconsider, knowing that the two of you are identical. I’ll make it worth your while. Jewels, gold, a new sword… whatever you’d like.”

Arthur’s heart sank. To be used this way… was deplorable to the highest degree, and not only that, it was a childish plan that could never work in a million years, but… this could be his only chance to get out his feelings safely and get over them.

“I don’t need any gold, but I’ll do it.”

“Oh? Every man has a price. What are you going to get out of this?”

Arthur didn’t answer.

iv.

Arthur took Gilgamesh’s hand and kissed it as softly and lovingly as one could. Gilgamesh bristled slightly—he was quite an actor! For a moment, he nearly thought Arthur was being sincere.

He made sure to do it in the common area, and drew a lot of confused looks from everyone around them while doing it. Saber Alter stopped eating for just a moment to stare in confusion. Gilgamesh was watching for everyone’s reactions, and Arthur could only focus on the fact that his skin was so soft, it didn’t betray the weathering of battle at all.

Gilgamesh would pretend to rebuff his affections while secretly drawing him back in again, making himself look available but curious. Now, Arthur was free to say all of the things he wanted to, under the pretense that he was courting the other man.

“I just can’t stop noticing how beautiful you are…” He says, bashful of his own words. “You fight so elegantly, and your laugh never leaves my mind.”

“Keep going…” Gilgamesh is looking off to the side as Arthur says this. Saber Alter, naturally, is disgusted.

“I just… want to be around you all the time. I can’t explain why,” How freeing it was to say all these things openly! “I feel like I could conquer everything with you by my side.”

“You’re good at this, Arthur,” Gilgamesh whispers quietly, curling his fingers around Arthur’s hand. Arthur dares to do something he only dreamed about before, and kisses Gilgamesh’s cheek. His cologne is… overpowering, to say the least, but at least his lips got to brush against that smooth skin. He knows this plan will never work, but Arthur isn’t scheming—he knows he will be disposed of as soon as Gilgamesh realizes this is an ill made plan.

He just wants to get everything out before then.

v.

Arthur holds his hand as they walk, talking about his world, about the Gilgamesh he knows, about how he feels differently about him because the Gil of this world holds an impressive, mysterious air about him that he can’t help but find so cool, and Gilgamesh seriously ponders if he should be paying him overtime for these compliments—they’re _good_. Da Vinci shakes her head at the two of them when they pass by, and Arthur offers a pitiable smile.

Arthur’s feelings aren’t diminishing though, which he had hoped they would—even this stupid idea is somewhat cute, it’s borderline grade school in its concoction, and it doesn’t suit a king like Gilgamesh at all. If there’s a word for it in this world, it’s probably ‘gap moe’.

Naturally, all of the Artorias are asking if he’s lost his mind, and he simply shakes his head and tells the honest truth—that something is possessing him to like Gilgamesh more than his counterparts, and now he hardly wishes to leave his side. All of them warn him that Gilgamesh is a bastard to the highest degree, and Arthur… knows that… somewhat. Lancer Artoria is the only one who seems to get what’s happening here, and disapproves mightily. It’s a good thing he doesn’t interact with his counterparts often.

“Arthur, if I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were truthfully in love with me,” Gilgamesh says, suddenly.

“I’m just a good actor,” Arthur reassures him, perhaps a little too quickly.

“It’s a shame it doesn’t seem to be working, though… perhaps we need to get a little more serious.”

Gilgamesh slams his hand on the wall that Arthur is backed up against, and leans in to kiss him—

_clink._

Their armor connects. Chest to chest, they can’t properly reach each other like this. Gilgamesh laughs it off, while Arthur stares at him with a stunned blush on his face. “Were you seriously going to—”

“Fuhahahaha! As if I would deign to kiss you!”

“…”

“Come on, Arthur, laugh with me. Even you had to think it was funny—"

Arthur is only looking away. Something clicks in Gilgamesh’s mind.

“You don’t seriously… feel this way about me?”

Arthur looks away, and Gilgamesh grabs his chin and pulls his head forward. He searches his green eyes with realization.

“You accepted so you could be close to me. That’s why you didn’t want any payment.”

Arthur glances away this time, now unable to face him.

“… how sneaky of you.”

Arthur pulls himself out of his grip and marches off down the halls. Gilgamesh lets him leave, chuckling to himself in an apparent dig at Arthur’s forwardness.

vi.

“So that was a bust,” Gilgamesh says to his closest, dearest friend. “A shame, since Saber never took the bait anyway…”

Enkidu laughs lightly, before tugging hard on Gilgamesh’s earring, nearly threatening to rip it out of his earlobe.

“Ow! Ow ow ow! Hey!”

“Arthur hardly deserves what you did to him. He’s always felt this way about you, I’ve been on rayshifts with him several times before and could see it plain as day. If you paid even the slightest bit of proper attention to him, you would’ve known you were using his feelings for you as bait. That’s not the case, is it?”

“I swear it isn’t--!”

“Then you used him without even knowing how he felt for you…” Enkidu lets go of his earring, and Gilgamesh holds his ear in pain. “Gilgamesh, can I ask you something?”

“Sure…” Gil is still warily holding his ear in case Enkidu tries to yank it again.

“Everything Arthur said to you, would you have wanted to hear it from Artoria?”

“Well… yes, he was good with his words… I suppose that’s because they came from a place of truth.”

“Yes, and?”

“… … and it was nice to hear someone with such reverent love, I suppose…”

“And?”

“… … … I shouldn’t have laughed at him.”

“You laughed at him?”

Enkidu’s hand darts up for the earring again, and Gilgamesh narrowly avoids it several times. “It’s habit! It’s habit!”

“What are you going to do to make it up to him?”

“…”

“Think about it,” is all Enkidu says to him.

vii.

Gilgamesh knocks on Arthur’s door. No answer.

He holds the bouquet of flowers in his hand tightly. This was dumb. Arthur probably didn’t like flowers. Knowing Arthur, all he had to bring was himself and that would probably brighten his day. Well, certainly not now, but…

Arthur was always happy to see him, wasn’t he? Like a Labrador. Wait, shit, don’t compare him to a dog—he was always happy to see him because he was in love with him. Gilgamesh realizes bitterly that the one Saber he’d dismissed was the one who returned his feelings, and he’s hardly paid attention to him for all of his efforts. He always has his back, always pulls up his hood around him. Is he truly so dense? Then again, he thought his plan would’ve worked…

Arthur finally answers the door. Gilgamesh pushes the bouquet into his face.

“Don’t think for a second this is because I…” That tsundere attitude snapped up right away, and Gil realizes he’s covering for his _own_ feelings, now. “I mean, here. Just take them.”

Arthur stares blankly at the flowers and takes them, but he still looks a bit hurt. Great, Gil thinks. I don’t know why that it would be all said and done with a few plants.

“You’re really the only Saber that noticed me, hm?” He says, somewhat bitterly.

“I… understand you have a history—”

“I know,” Gilgamesh nods. “I know. But I never thought _you_ would be the one to like me.”

“Is it really so surprising? I like you a lot.”

“I realize that now… I’m not just here to say I’m sorry.”

“You’re apologizing?” That didn’t sound like Gilgamesh.

“I… eh… I’m going to give you a chance!” Gilgamesh regains himself haughtily by the end of the line, crossing his arms with a hearty laugh. “To prove to me you’re the one worthy of my affections, over who I’ve kept my eyes on for quite some time!”

“Hm?”

“If you still feel that way, I mean—of course you still feel this way! This is me we’re talking about! You’re permitted to court me. Just realize that I won’t fall for you so _easily_. You’re going to have to work and--”

Arthur leans forward and kisses his cheek, which now has _context_, damn it—causing Gil to cover his face and realize, shit, this is what I could’ve had all along? He’s meeting all of my expectations!

“I won’t go without a fight,” Arthur says, and it sends a chill down Gilgamesh’s spine.

“Good! Good. Let’s see you impress me.”

viii.

Arthur is a romantic at heart, sweetly kissing along Gilgamesh’s knuckles, and Gil doesn’t have _any idea _what to do about it. He’s never been the courted, only the courter. To be on the other end of such affections is… nice, for a change, but he’s not sure how to handle it. Neither do the other Sabers, for that matter. They’re all staring as if Arthur’s crazy, and for all they know, he might as well be. He thinks Gilgamesh is cute, a notion very few people in Chaldea accept.

Arthur tenderly cleaned his wounds after combat—when everyone else was content to just let him bleed out on the battlefield.

Arthur wanted to take him dancing, step by step, at one of Chaldea’s parties—when usually he’d have to bully a lower-tiered servant into doing it and then say it was their idea.

Arthur is too cute…! Gilgamesh covers his mouth and realizes this isn’t so bad at all, not while Arthur is still Arthur. He’s making headway into learning about him, too. He doesn’t understand Arthur’s world all that well, but he’s learning, and a little offended that there’s another Gilgamesh out there—he was content being the only one.

He leans over to Arthur’s side, and his lips brush against his cheek before Gilgamesh reels back and tries to forget what he just did. Arthur laughs. This is still strange, okay! This isn’t the right Saber, but at the same time…

He’s not complaining.


	2. to prove (how I feel) (T)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> One year later...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This might become a drabble collection, lmao.

i.

Gilgamesh’s boyfriend is nearly perfect, and he almost hates it.

Waking up the next day to him is like waking up with a sunbeam on your face, except it’s more like getting a warm kiss and a soft ‘good morning’ to rouse you out of your sleep. Every time he sees Arthur’s face too close to his he scrunches up his nose in embarrassment and nearly throws a pillow at him. Gilgamesh has tried to wake up before him, to get a picture of his face all disheveled, but Arthur is radiant even while fast asleep, and he somehow wakes up when Gilgamesh has the camera out anyway and flashes it a smile. All the pictures Arthur takes of Gilgamesh just before waking up have him totally a mess and looking like he’s snoring—which just isn’t _fair_.

As Gilgamesh sits up from the bed and stretches out lazily, Arthur cheekily slips his hands into his shirt and squeezes his chest, earning a gentle elbow to the face but it’s well worth it. These halcyon mornings are too much, Gil is thoroughly spoiled by Arthur now that he’s welcomed him into his life. It’s like Arthur lives to peel away the royal dignity of a King and see him reduced to playful antics, of which he was mostly on the receiving end of.

(Don’t tell anyone, not a soul, but he loves it.)

Arthur already made cinnamon rolls for breakfast, and though servants don’t need to eat, Gil is now accustomed to this ritual every single morning. Suddenly, pompously appearing and disappearing at will instead of waking up next to your (absolutely bangin’) boyfriend seemed lackluster even if it made for a good entrance. Arthur is taming him, somehow. No one in Chaldea understands why Arthur is tolerating someone like him, but being the object of everyone’s jealousy is a role Gilgamesh fills naturally.

When Arthur whispers ‘I love you’ in his ear, Gilgamesh bristles and isn’t sure how to respond. In lieu of saying the words back, he kisses Arthur, which he hopes communicates without forcing him to speak the words.

Arthur looks at him sadly after but doesn’t press it.

ii.

It’s been a full year now, by the way.

Or nearly that.

It’s nearly that. Gilgamesh just remembered.

An _anniversary_ is coming, he recalls.

Gilgamesh looks at a calendar and sees that the weekend would mark one full year. Wouldn’t it just be the best to get one over on Arthur, who likely doesn’t remember? Okay, he—might… might definitely remember, but to show him that he remembers, too? A wise king knows that you don’t say I love you through your words, you show it in your actions. What better way to impress Arthur than by giving him the surprise of a lifetime? Gilgamesh is usually a bit thoughtless when it comes to these things, how delightful to prove him wrong!

But.

What on earth should he do?

Arthur usually cooks, so… should he? Bah, that menial labor is beneath him—but it’s not beneath Arthur, who’s just as much of a king, so he should try and make something for a change? When Gilgamesh orders their master to take Arthur on a standard rayshift the early morning of their anniversary, he sets to work right away.

“Get out of my kitchen,” Emiya orders.

“It’s _Chaldea’s_ kitchen, and I can do what I want.”

Emiya groans, and goes back to whatever he’s doing. Gilgamesh unfolds a recipe for cardamom cake, which he remembers enjoying while alive. He might as well show Arthur what a proper cake tastes like! Winding up his arm and tying a spare apron on, he’s absolutely ready. He can do this. After all, a King is successful at everything the first time, right?

Wrong.

Eventually, he has to ask Emiya for help, who outright refuses, so he goes to Tamamo Cat, who makes the whole thing—start to finish—look easy. Gil is a mess of flour and spices and has to clean up, but the pristine cardamom cake is easily going to be the centerpiece of everything else he’s going to set up.

Anniversaries are punctuated with jewelry and flowers, right? Jewelry is easy, one dip into his treasury and he’s sure he’ll have something Arthur will like. Flowers, though… it was hard to get them in Antarctica.

Unless.

iii.

“Of course I’ll help! If you do me a favor in return.”

Chaldea’s own bastard mage is already taking advantage of Gilgamesh’s patience, but he can’t afford to threaten him or the man will make something magically wrong with the flowers. He hasn’t forgotten the last batch that had a really strange pollen in them.

“What is it you want, magus?”

“Could you dig through your treasury for something Ritsuka would really like? I’m trying to win them over but it seems—”

“What do you want with our Master?” Gilgamesh asks, suspiciously.

“Oh, you know… they’re only the only interesting human being in a Chaldea filled with Heroic Spirits. I want to give them a token of my affection.”

“To get in their pants?” Gilgamesh crosses his arms, knowing exactly what the mage is angling at. Merlin looks at him as if to go ‘who, me?’

“I can think of ten people straight off the bat that wouldn’t allow that to happen, no matter how trustworthy I am. No, I just want to show our master that I like them. It’s the same as what you’re doing now, isn’t it? Showing the boyfriend who you don’t deserve that you love them?”

Gilgamesh tsks, and can’t really contend with Merlin there. Opening a golden portal, he pulls out a bracelet with runes from the Arthurian era, as ‘proof’ it’s from Merlin’s heyday, and tosses it at the mage. He whistles and tells him this will do nicely. Merlin tells him to stand back and he conjures the loveliest bouquet of red and white roses that Gilgamesh has ever seen—not a single one bruised or even slightly wilted. The mage begins to talk about how red and white could be a symbol of their love, but Gilgamesh holds the bouquet over his shoulder and simply says “See ya.”

iv.

Now for the jewelry…

… which isn’t hard, considering Gilgamesh has quite a bit to choose from in his treasury. He sits in his room checking over an assortment of things that could mean something to Arthur, nothing so excessive as a ring but nothing that would be cumbersome under the armor as a necklace, which meant bracelets were his only option. He pulls out a lapis lazuli bracelet, similar to the one he gave Ritsuka for the valentine’s day chocolate, and sighs. He can’t mimic what he gave master! That’s… hmm…

He remembers there’s one bracelet in his treasury that would suit him, but—wait, shit. Didn’t it have Arthurian runes…?

He gave it to Merlin, didn’t he. He barely took time to look at it! Shit, now what’s he supposed to do…? He absolutely can order that he gives it back, but Merlin probably wasted no time in giving it to their master… knowing him, there was probably something he wanted from them.

That puts him back at square one. Damn it. Somehow, having access to all the wealth in the world doesn’t provide him access to the one, perfect thing for Arthur.

It’s OK, it’s OK. He can salvage this. The cardamom cake and roses are on their little round table, accompanied by fresh fruit and some wine all looked good, but it’s missing a gift to round it all out. He quickly hurries through his treasury, pulling out treasure after treasure before tossing them back in. At the sound of the door opening behind him, he quickly throws a velvet box he hasn’t opened on the table and turns to see Arthur—

… an absolute mess.

The rayshifting was a disaster. He only very nearly escaped with his head. It was three giant boars and their Master was attempting something like a ‘challenge’, which left him with no support. Arthur stops talking about it when he notices the cake and flowers.

“… what’s all this?” He asks, somewhat happily.

He doesn’t remember. A smile picks up on Gilgamesh’s face—he doesn’t even remember! Mr. Perfect doesn’t have a _single_ goddamn _idea_ it’s their anniversary! Gilgamesh is all too happy to gloat about it, but first, he has Arthur, still in his somewhat dented armor, sit in front of their coffee table.

“You don’t remember…?” Gilgamesh asks, knowing full well that Arthur doesn’t and is taking total glee in it.

“Remember what?”

“It’s a certain special date. One you might feel a bit _sheepish_ about not remembering…” Arthur may not know what he’s talking about, but he can see the competitive, gloating expression easily on Gilgamesh’s face. That mean’s he’s fucked up somehow, but Gilgamesh is reveling in it rather than angry about it. Usually, he’s the one who remembers special dates…

“Don’t keep me guessing… did you make this?” He points to the cake.

“As a matter of fact, I—had help. But yes, I helped make it. Anyway, Arthur, don’t you think we’ve been together for a while--?”

“What’s this?” Arthur picks up the velvet box and opens it, leaving Gilgamesh to scream internally. He didn’t even check that one! Arthur stares at its contents for a moment, before glancing at Gilgamesh to say “Seriously?” Gilgamesh tries to stick with his guns and nods, sheepishly, not knowing what damn thing he just gave Arthur, hoping to god it’s not something awkward, but Arthur removes his gloves to take out a necklace with a beautiful Celtic cross hanging from it. It’s old, and not the most polished thing in the world, but Arthur’s looking at it with amazement. Gilgamesh sighs in relief. Arthur deserves better, but if he likes this—

He shifts out of his armor, letting it disappear into golden sparks so that he can put it around his neck, smiling slightly. “You were saying…?”

Gilgamesh isn’t sure where he left off. “Right—anyway, it’s been a while since we started dating…”

Arthur just looks at him with warm, confused eyes, and it’s distracting Gilgamesh.

“… it’s our anniversary.”

Arthur blinks.

Then he stands up with a start, nearly knocking the vase of flowers onto the cake.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t—"

“Remember?” Gilgamesh chuckles to himself, glad to be the flawless one for once. “It’s okay, it afforded me time to surprise you—”

“No, I didn’t realize it was today!”

Arthur goes to his dresser, pushing around clothes in order to find something he’s been working on for a long time. He pulls out a leather notebook that Gilgamesh has seen in sneak peeks, always hastily hidden whenever he opened the door to their room and saw it in Arthur’s hands. He looks it over before glancing up at Arthur.

“It’s… a journal.”

“Yeah—” Arthur says. “Open it.”

Inside is sloppy Sumerian writing accompanied by photographs Arthur had taken over the year. He can barely read it, but they’re short messages, some about Gil, some about Arthur, all little meaningful tidbits about the two of them with photos of them as their relationship progressed. The most recent one was a photo of the two of them laying in bed, Gilgamesh rolled onto his side as Arthur puts his finger to his lips as if to hush the camera. Beneath that, in progressively better Sumerian, is written; “Thank you for showing me that the best things can be worlds away.”

“Who taught you…?” Gilgamesh asks, quietly.

“Enkidu. They were more than willing to help. More importantly—did you plan all this? Gilgamesh, that’s amaz—"

Gilgamesh cuts him off to kiss him, which Arthur gently and sweetly returns. It wasn’t an easy year—Gilgamesh wasn’t the easiest boyfriend to have. It isn’t easy for Gilgamesh to have a boyfriend at all, but Arthur is worth it. He rues the day he’ll have to say goodbye to him forever, but he’s going to enjoy every moment he has now.

v.

The cake is half-eaten and Gilgamesh is sprawled on his bed with Arthur.

His chin is resting in the crook of Arthur’s neck as his arm reaches across his torso and his fingers intertwine with Arthur’s. He’s perfectly content. He senses Arthur isn’t, though. Something is worrying him, or perhaps making him a little sad, and it’s spoiling the mood. He’s probably thinking about how he’ll have to leave again. The words in the journal reminded him or something.

Gilgamesh bites his lip and squeezes his hand. “Arthur?”

“Yeah?”

“I…” He mumbled.

“Hm?”

“I love you.”

It’s funny. Arthur never imagined hearing those words from him, someone he assumed was too proud to say them. Now that he hears them, they break his heart.

“I love you too.”


	3. i find you so (charming) (T)

“BB Channel sloooots go--! Oh, what’s this? It seems the first person in the lineup is charmed! But… hey, what gives?!”

BB’s voice in the training chamber cut off as the simulation came to an end. Arthur staggered on his feet before falling to his knees. His face was flushed, and his hand was on his forehead, using Excalibur to keep himself aloft. Gilgamesh rushed over to his side, spitting venom at BB. “Mongrel! What the hell did you do to him?!”

“I don’t know, he’s not charmed at me! Normally he’d be looking at me—rightfully so—with goo-goo eyes and refusing to attack! I think I just charmed him _in general_…”

“Gilgamesh, your eyes…” Arthur gasped quietly, framing his face with his hands. “They’re beautiful.”

Gil merely stared at him for a few moments before looking back up at BB. “Look what you’ve done! He’s gone insane!”

“Easy! Easy easy easy, it’ll wear off!” BB glanced to the side shiftily. “In about a day. I really shouldn’t have put that option in the slot machine… it’s an extra super-duper charm that was supposed to work on my senpai. The odds of getting it are ridiculously low, so…”

“It clearly wasn’t ridiculously low enough.” Gilgamesh put Arthur’s arm over his shoulder and helped him up. Arthur now couldn’t keep his hands off of him, clinging to him from the side, burying his nose in the side of his neck as he kissed it. Gilgamesh groaned… he’d have to wrestle him back to their room like this. As he began to walk out of the training simulator, he wondered why BB was even allowed to use her slots in training. He had the sneaking suspicion that she just went for it and other people accepted it as a ‘challenge.’

“You’re so… handsome…” Arthur murmured beneath his breath as Gilgamesh ignored the prying eyes from all around Chaldea’s hallways. “When did you get so handsome?”

“I’ve always been handsome, Arthur, and you know it.”

“I know it, I know it…” Arthur took the palm of Gilgamesh’s hand and kissed it, clearly infatuated beyond words. In any other situation, this might’ve won Gil over, but all he could think about was how he’d have to manage the next 24 hours babysitting a lovesick fool. When he pressed the button to open their door, Arthur tumbled in after him, setting Excalibur aside to lavish attention on Gil, who tolerated it. As Arthur backed him up against the door and rested his hands on his hip, Gilgamesh let him take an inch to turn into a mile.

“I’m going to have to get Master to use Rain of Isis on you—just you wait—”

“Is this so bad, though? I understand I’m not acting… right… but…”

He pecked Gilgamesh’s cheek, who was understandably growing flustered with this. Arthur took him by the hand and held him at the small of his waist, dipping him as Gilgamesh put both hands over his face as he strained to kiss him. “Arthur, come on!”

“I just love you so much—”

“You’re being a nuisance!”

Arthur didn’t even look hurt at that. He stood up properly before spinning Gil underneath his arm, pulling him in chest-to-chest. His smooth moves were clearly amplified by whatever was charming him, and Gil could hardly deal with it. Sure, some part of him was enjoying being doted on, but this wasn’t Arthur! He’d be more… well… Arthur was pretty sweet with him at first, wasn’t he? Still, this was different!

“Arthur, I swear—”

“Just give me a chance. Please, I can’t control this…”

Gilgamesh supposed he didn’t really remember what it was like when he was under the influence of being charmed. It was always hazy until he came out of it. He didn’t really know what Arthur was going through that moment…

“I’ll give you a chance to do what, exactly?”

Arthur wrapped his arms around him and pulled him in. “Just let me love you for a bit, okay?”

Gilgamesh gave a soft ‘hmph’. “Fine.”

\--

Gil sat in between Arthur’s legs as Arthur worked kisses into the back of his neck. It seemed to be calming him down, like a cat with separation anxiety grooming another cat. It was just making Gil so flushed. They were only a few months into their relationship, and Arthur usually kept it to chaste kisses on the hand and knuckle, with a few kisses before they went into battle together. This was on another level entirely, and it was causing him to bristle slightly.

“Feel better?” He asked tentatively.

“Yeah… just as long as you don’t go. I feel like I can clear my thoughts if—” He kissed him again. “You’re here.”

He supposed this was part and parcel for being in a relationship as servants. There were messy things that altered their mindsets in Chaldea constantly. Being used as puppets for one event or another… he was glad to have his mind for this. Relenting just a bit, Gilgamesh uncrossed his arms and rested his hand on Arthur’s thigh, leaning back. He had to make himself comfortable. Arthur moved to kiss the top of his shoulder, and Gilgamesh shivered just a bit.

“Everything okay?”

“Do you really have to keep kissing me…?”

“It just feels better if I do. I can stop, though—”

He could hear the attempt at restraint in his voice. “No…” Gilgamesh said, sighing. “You can keep going.”

Taking it as absolute permission, Arthur nibbled at the crook of his neck, and Gilgamesh closed his eyes. When did this kind of behavior get him so flustered? He was never this type of person before. Was it just Arthur that made him feel this way? Something about surrendering to him when he was overcome with these fluffy, romantic feelings both made him feel a little off and a little excited. He just hoped that Arthur wouldn’t regret it when he came to.

He glanced at the clock. Only two hours had passed since Arthur became initially charmed.

Damn.

\--

Arthur held onto his hand as he looked for their master. It seemed like he couldn’t go anywhere without holding onto Gilgamesh in some way. This wasn’t like a normal charming, where it simply paralyzed the target from attacking their enemy—this was full-on infatuation.

“Master--!”

Thank god! Gilgamesh was getting worried. “Use your Rain of Isis on this fool. He’s charmed.”

Ritsuka looked at the lovey-dovey Arthur then back at Gilgamesh with a smirk. “But it’s kind of cute, don’t you think?”

“_Master_.”

“Alright, alright… Mystic Code: Rain of Isis!”

A bright green glow lit up around Arthur, faded, and Gilgamesh stared for a moment. Surely, this would be the end of it—

Arthur took his hand to his lips and kissed it. God. Damn it.

“Maybe it’s one of those debuff-proof buffs…?”

“He can’t stay like this. I prefer my Arthur sane.”

“’Your’ Arthur?” Ritsuka tittered.

“Yes, _my_ Arthur. If that’s all you can do for us, I’ll be taking him elsewhere.”

\--

Nobody else in Chaldea was any help.

Medea Lily, for all of her skill in healing, only gave a shrug when her Noble Phantasm did little to help Arthur’s mind. It looked like he was going to be set with Arthur acting like this for however long it took to wear off. At least that put him out of commission for fighting.

Sitting together in the cafeteria, Gilgamesh tried to do anything but stare back into Arthur’s saccharine gaze.

“Do you feel any better? At all?”

“I feel fantastic. Just being with you makes me happy.”

Right, so he was still crazy. “What does it feel like? Being so… hopelessly in love with me.” He tried to make conversation so that Arthur wouldn’t get up to the other side of the table and start kissing him again. Arthur’s hand reached out to hold his, and he gave him a gentle smile.

“It’s like my armor weighs nothing. Like I’m walking on water. … well, neither of those things are very new, but it feels like my senses are heightened around you sevenfold. It’s like I’m drowning in too much air.”

“While an appropriate reaction to me, that still sounds…”

Arthur laughed. “It’s okay. I feel fine. Really!”

“So if I walked away, you wouldn’t suddenly fall in love with someone else?”

“Mmm… I don’t want to find out if that’s the case. I’m happy just with you.”

True, Gil’s jealousy wouldn’t be able to take it if he suddenly started lavishing attention on another person. Still, holding hands with him in such a public place felt like excessive PDA. Sure, it asserted his territory, but with Arthur, it made him feel such a strange way. Like butterflies in his stomach, only _real_ butterflies trying to fight their way out. It was a strange mix of anxiety and wanting more that he had no business dealing with. He was a king! Damn it, he would regain his composure no matter what.

“Fear not. I will take care of you while you’re delirious. Fitting, how sickness eludes servants but comes back to haunt us in the strangest of ways. Come, Arthur! I will let you work out your illness in a more private setting.”

Biting back a chuckle, Arthur let him take him by the shoulder and lead the two of them back to their shared room.

\--

Really, it was Arthur’s room, but Gilgamesh had crashed there so often that it might as well become both their room. It normally took on the appearance of a stark white hospital room, but servants were known to customize their rooms to fit themselves. Some people had gone excessively overboard, down to painting the walls in total violation of the rules. Arthur’s was quaint, he had a closet full of spare clothes and an extra-large bed to accommodate the two of them.

Arthur was now entertaining himself by tracing his fingers over Gilgamesh’s tattoos, the gentle touch nearly having Gil swat his hands. He quickly shoved Arthur towards his closet and told him to change into something to sleep in, trying not to focus on how good it felt and how he’d like to let him continue…

Soon enough, the two were in bed. Even if servants couldn’t dream, it was worth it to keep some human habits, some vices, some things to keep them from staying up all night doing nothing.

Arthur was the big spoon, tucking his arm around his waist and snuggled up close to him, the soft sound of his breathing helping Gilgamesh nod off. But… his mind was racing. Should he really squander an opportunity like this? Arthur was being excessively affectionate and was likely to be hazy on the details after the charm wore off. It could give Gilgamesh the chance to be affectionate back while keeping his dignity as a professional tsundere. Rolling over in his arms, he pushed Arthur back onto the bed with a smirk. Arthur’s eyes lit up.

“I’m only doing this because you won’t remember later,” He whispered as he leaned in to kiss Arthur, who happily accepted, reaching around his shoulders for the umpteenth time that day to kiss back. Gilgamesh got comfortable atop him, smooching everything from the tip of his nose to his cheeks to his chin. Arthur laughed delightedly, tilting his head to the side to give him access to his neck.

“—Gilgamesh, that’s…”

“Hm?”

“That’s hilarious… thinking I won’t remember later.”

Huh?

Gil looked at him suspiciously before pinching his cheek. “Are you…?”

“I’ve been back to normal ever since Master used her Rain of Isis. Sorry!”

Gilgamesh stared at him for all but a few moments and then took a pillow and whapped Arthur in the face with it, over and over, as Arthur broke into laughter saying “Stop, stop!” Catching his wrists, Arthur finally ended the pillow barrage and could speak.

“It was just so sweet seeing you so flustered, I—” The impish grin on his face was unmistakable. “I was just going to keep it up for a little bit, then you kept making such cute faces…”

“You’re lucky you’re worthy of me, Pendragon, or I’d suffocate you with this pillow!”

“I’m sure you have a ton of pillows in your Gates of Babylon. I’d never stand a chance.”

“You wouldn’t. That’s for sure.”

Gilgamesh sighed, looking back on Arthur’s actions. Knowing half of them were sincere, he couldn’t stay mad. This was Arthur he was talking about.

“Anyway, where were we?”

“Eh? I thought you were only doing that because you thought I wouldn’t remember—”

“Well, now that I know that you _will_, it gives me twice as much reason to do it.”

As Gilgamesh leaned down over him, pressing another kiss to his neck, Arthur reached to the side to turn off the lamp light.

They may not sleep like normal humans, but that didn’t mean they wouldn’t make their own sweet dreams.


	4. i could just (drink you up) (T)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Halloween Special: Gilgamesh’s spirit origin has been altered into a vampiric state that needs mana transfers via blood to sustain himself. Arthur volunteers to be a willing victim while Da Vinci tries to figure out a cure. Vlad III is just highly… highly offended by all of this.

The first thing Gilgamesh does is lick his sharpened, elongated canines.

The bite from the monster was strong enough to alter his spirit origin, which Gilgamesh felt was undamageable, unconquerable, unbreakable. To be infected is a sign of weakness, and he’s pissed about it. Already, he’s hungry, and Heroic Spirits don’t need to eat, but he knows what he hungers for isn’t food of any kind. He’s familiar with the love bites he’s placed all over Arthur and he wants so badly to sink his teeth into his skin. He’s barely registering what Da Vinci has to say. Vampiric virus… manageable, for a genius like her, but she’ll need time to make a cure… when she mentions how his spirit origin now needs Mana, different than what Chaldea’s reserves provide—it needs to come from a source, a person or servant, it doesn’t matter, Arthur raises his hand and says “I’ll do it. It’s only fair.”

Gil is practically chomping at the bit to bite him then and there, but he’s… worried about Arthur. He never particularly cared about injuring anyone, but the fact is that he’s hungering. He practically knows just how to do it, too. Just the right angle to bite him so that red blossoms on his skin and he drinks it up as he retracts his fangs. Da Vinci mentions that from analyzing the monsters that bit him, he should have a pleasurable numbing agent in his fang and offers her neck to bite for scientific purposes.

“Mongrel. Only Arthur is worthy to be bitten by me.” Enkidu would be, too, but Enkidu was… well, clay. Not a lot of blood there to speak of, so to speak.

“Well then, go ahead and bite him so we can treat him here.”

Something about this absolutely offended Gilgamesh’s senses. Biting already felt intuitively like a private affair, not something to be done in front of a bunch of people. As Arthur undoes the collar of his shirt, Gilgamesh stops him.

“No. We’re going to do this in our room.”

“Oh…?” Arthur doesn’t sound nervous at all for someone who was about to have his blood drawn from his neck—maybe there are wore injuries to have. Gil nods. Already, his instincts are commanding him ‘do this’ and ‘do that’, and Da Vinci knows there is no convincing the golden king to do something he doesn’t want to do, even if it might help his spirit origin repair.

“Just report back to us via the network with your findings, okay? Assuming you don’t get used to being a vampire.”

“Just focus on curing me, mongrel. I don’t want to have to get used to this.” Still, Gilgamesh is grinning.

Vlad III just looks at Gilgamesh with considerable disgust, shaking his head. “He’s practically excited to go and bite him…”

Gilgamesh takes Arthur by the hand, leading him back into his room.

\--

He can already feel his spirit origin weakening. This is what it means to be a vampire? It’s like a curse has been put on him by someone’s noble phantasm or ability—sapping his strength and leaving him worse off. Arthur removes his shirt and sits on their shared bed, looking up at Gilgamesh with trusting eyes. Gil can’t stand it—he wants to pounce him and tear into his skin and leave Arthur looking like the cover of a bodice ripper.

“Whenever you’re ready, Gil.”

Still, he feels some… trepidation at this. How badly would he hurt Arthur? Surely a wound like that would continue to bleed well after he’d bitten him unless there’s magic laced in his fangs. Still, he’s aching to bite him, craving his skin raked against his teeth so much that it’s like craving a favorite food. Arthur is good and holy in the eyes of his God, he’s sure, so how would his blood taste? Gilgamesh climbs onto the bed and sits behind him, letting Arthur tilt his head so he can graze his flesh with those sharp fangs. Arthur winces, and it brings Gilgamesh back to reality.

“You’re sure? The woman offered her neck and I suppose I could settle for it—”

“No. I want it to be me.”

There’s a conviction in his voice that Gilgamesh finds pleasing, and he lines up his teeth on his neck for a perfect bite, instinct convincing him that this was the right place. He figures a countdown is meaningless, that Arthur is waiting in bated breath for him to bite down anyway, so he does. The explosion of copper flavor on his tongue is delicious, and he finds himself wriggling against Arthur’s body as his fangs sink in deeper and he drinks his fill. What Da Vinci said about the ‘pleasurable, numbing’ feeling must have been true, because instead of shouting in pain, Arthur’s head just lolls to the side as he gives a contented sigh. This is… bliss… an almost opium-like high from sucking his blood, Gilgamesh can’t get enough. It’s only when Arthur goes slack that he remembers to pull out his fangs, feeling rejuvenated and content, grabbing a cloth and pressing it to Arthur’s neck.

“Arthur? Arthur, are you okay…?”

“Mm, a little weak… you must have drunk a lot.”

“Chaldea’s reserves will replenish you and you have Avalon. Da Vinci didn’t say anything about me turning you into one too, so you should be fine.”

Once the bleeding stops, Arthur reaches up for Gil as he lays down back against the bed. Gil takes the spot of the big spoon this time, wanting to be close to his bite so he could run his tongue along it and taste the residual blood. Something in his fangs must make it so that it heals over quickly—that, or it’s simply the sword’s sheath doing its job. Either way, the experience is delightful and quickly addicting. Though he doesn’t like the idea of dependency on this, he doesn’t exactly want it to end so soon, either.

\--

“Oh, Arthur--!”

The King of Knights comes back from the training session bleeding from various injuries on his body. Ritsuka is the first to apologize and offer to heal him, but Gilgamesh makes her stand down. Though Arthur is aching all over, Gilgamesh is quick to bring him behind closed doors and strip him of his blue outer jacket. Before Avalon can close Arthur’s wounds, Gilgamesh runs his tongue over the blood on his wrists, his arms, on his collarbone, even as the little slashes disappear, Arthur can tell he’s getting addicted to this.

“Are you sure you don’t just want to bite me?”

“Is that an invitation?”

“I… think we should enjoy things while they last, so…”

Gilgamesh is quick to pin him to the bed and ravenously sink his teeth into his neck once more, where the puncture marks are still barely visible from the last time. Arthur cries out, embracing Gil on either side of him as he takes his time drinking. Panting softly until Gil licks over the wound and it closes, Arthur is back on the bed, heaving with breath. At first, he wants to draw Gil back down into his arms, but Gil is off staring at something to the side.

“Gil…?”

“Arthur… what does my hair look like?”

“Kind of messy… why?”

“I can’t see my reflection.”

Arthur sits up and looks to where Gil is staring and sees that the mirror that sits beside their bed isn’t showing his reflection at all, only Arthur’s. This is too much for the king’s vanity—who thought he’d always materialized picture perfect. Once the high wears off from the bite, he makes sure to have Arthur sit down and brush his hair for him.

“You look fine, I think…” Still, he’s running a comb through his hair and following Gilgamesh’s instructions on how to get it just right.

“It’s not enough to just comb it. I still don’t know how you get that little cowlick of yours to stand up on its own. It has to be iconic.”

Arthur laughs and runs the comb through his hair once more. “There. It looks just like you.”

“I’ll take your word for it.” While the rest of Chaldea is overrun with servants dealing with Elizabeth’s latest Halloween scheme, the two are wrapped up in their own Halloween drama. Arthur’s not complaining, and while Gilgamesh is still taking it as a weakness, he can’t deny the draw that Arthur’s blood has for him—and perhaps, the closeness it affords the two of them without having to make excuses to cozy up. It’s instinctual, like a mate’s protectiveness, only it’s between a vampire-coded Servant and their ‘victim’.

He’s not entirely sure vampires feel so warm towards their victims usually, but in this case, he definitely does.

\--

Da Vinci opens their door with little ceremony.

“I have it!” She holds aloft the little glass vial containing Gilgamesh’s cure. The two are cuddled up upon one another in their room, and Gilgamesh raises his head in indignance.

“Took you long enough, Mongrel.”

“Ah, ah, call this genius a mongrel again and I might let my hand slip and have you remain a vampiric servant forever…” Da Vinci teases. Arthur and Gilgamesh look at each other with a knowing stare. The thought might be not be so bad, being a blood bag and a vampire respectively. Still, Gilgamesh detests weaknesses in all their forms, so he strides over and takes the vial from Da Vinci.

As soon as he tips it back into his mouth and swallows, there’s a sharp pain in his canines as they recede back to a normal if slightly sharper position. He touches his mouth gently—well, there goes his escapades as a vampire. He can’t help but notice Arthur looking slightly disappointed, as well.

“Come on, now, Arthur…” Da Vinci isn’t done roasting the two of them. “All he has to do is get bitten by that same monster again, and you two can have all the fun in the world…”

“You’ve served your purpose, now get out,” Gilgamesh orders.

“Thank you,” Arthur says the words Gilgamesh won’t, and Da Vinci gives a soft ‘hmph’ and takes her leave.

“You know…” Arthur looks at Gil, patting the space next to him on the bed. “You don’t have to be a vampire to want to bite me.”

Gilgamesh’s gaze flits to the side—does he look embarrassed? “I know.”

Arthur tilts his neck to the side, revealing the four puncture marks where Gil bit him last. “I know they'll heal over soon, but I think I’d like to keep them as a souvenir. It was crazy, being bitten like that, but it also felt real… really nice. How did it feel to you?”

“Like… you were quenching a thirst I never knew I had.” Gil says finally, eyeing the puncture marks. “I doubt your blood would taste any good now, but it was like ambrosia. I bet it helps that you’re the King of Knights, after all. Holy sword wielder and all that.”

Arthur leans in to nuzzle Gil, who tolerates it as a cat does to an equally affectionate owner. He whispers something into Gil’s ear that makes him turn the faintest hint of red before he laughs it off and elbows Arthur.

“Maybe you can be the vampire next time.”

“I won’t be nearly as merciful as you were.”

“Hah! You call that mercy?”

“I do,” Arthur’s voice is dangerous and close. “You were worried about me the entire time. I’d just bite you and take what I needed.”

“Stop lying, you’re softhearted,” but Gil can’t deny the effect his words have on him.

“Sure, sure. I’m just teasing… unless?”

Arthur leans in to Gilgamesh’s neck and bites him, causing the man to jolt. There’s no numbing agent this time, and it’s not nearly as pleasant, but Gilgamesh keens nonetheless.

“See?” Arthur laughs. “I’m ruthless.”

Gilgamesh rubs his neck. “Sure… sure you are, Arthur. As ruthless as a kitten.”


	5. someday we'll (meet again)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is there enough room in your heart, Gil, for someone who will inevitably leave you?

Gilgamesh knew Arthur carried damage with him from that other world he came from, he knew it—he knew that the humble person he was now was a being who came out re-forged through pain. He knew that Arthur, for the sweet mask he put on, held a lot of secrets he wouldn’t speak, not even to his partner. Perhaps because he knew Gilgamesh would give unwanted advice, or worse, give advice that was perfectly reasonable that Arthur would not follow through on. Gilgamesh was many things, egotistical and cruel, but he was not an idiot.

Still, perhaps it was a man’s burden from such a long-ago era to shoulder pain on their own. Ritsuka would never allow it, but even their master didn’t seem to get through to Arthur, not totally. Gilgamesh wouldn’t wound Arthur’s pride if he could help it, it was one of the things he respected him for.

Even so, he yearned to see Arthur’s inner depths. He got glimpses, in the ways that sometimes Arthur would snap at him for pushing his boundaries a little too far. Arthur was no prince, he was a _king_, and kings were to be respected. He was humble when he wanted to be, and he certainly saw something within Gilgamesh—enough to want to date him, anyway—and that showed Gilgamesh a certain respect. Perhaps he even wanted to emulate him a little, or have Gilgamesh fill the spots of Arthur left empty from time and loss.

Normally, Gilgamesh wouldn’t permit anyone to use him in such a way, but his best friend had taught him that people _needed_ each other to fill those holes, and he’d be nothing without Enkidu’s wisdom. Therefore, Gilgamesh gave Arthur his unspoken permission to lean on him for those bits of him that were gone to the void.

The summer heat was bearable on Luluhawa, and Gilgamesh was happy that at the end of the day, he had his friend’s time to himself before they went off to help Ereshkigal with something important. It was then that he found himself all by his lonesome.

Sure, he could bother Ozymandias, but he was thinking of Arthur. Arthur, who had been avoiding him while he lost his memories, who had looked hurt the moment Gilgamesh didn’t recognize him and went on referring to himself as ‘Gorgeous P’. He’d neglected his precious partner. There was nothing a little bit of affection couldn’t fix, so he stood up to go find him.

The warm summer sunlight bathed him in a glow he was sure drew eyes. His blue shirt unbuttoned completely, he was sure—ah, the moment Arthur saw him, he wouldn’t be able to keep his hands off him, especially now that there was familiarity in his eyes. Perhaps he was aggrandizing his own image a bit much, but he knew Arthur. He knew how those soft, green eyes trained on him whenever he entered a room. Arthur was just as captivating to him.

Finally, he saw him near the tide pools, flipping through the many books he purchased at ServaFes. Odd… he didn’t pinpoint Arthur for the type to care about these things.

“My dear Arthur reading the yearly offerings? I guess there’s a first for everything. I never expected you to care about something like this.”

“I just—some things caught my eye, is all.”

He barely gave any response to Gilgamesh finally recognizing him, which got ever so slightly on Gilgamesh’s nerves. Surely he should be praising him for getting his memory back, or showering him in affection for it?

But, he knew better. Arthur must have been deeply preoccupied if he wasn’t giving it a second glance. He sat down next to them and flipped through the books that he picked out.

The first was the monster and the princess by none other than Jeanne Alter. That one was rather impressive, but as he flipped through the other doujinshi, he found one featuring… himself and Ozymandias, one of himself and Enkidu as a schoolgirl (bizarre), another featuring himself and the king of conquerors… and one featuring Arthur and Merlin, with a big R-18 slapped on the cover.

“What on Earth do you have this for?!”

“Merlin forced it on me! He said ‘it sells well, and … “daddy”—he called himself that, not me-- needs his paper for the Luluhawa gentlemen’s clubs’.” Arthur sounded faintly annoyed. “Nobody should have taught that man modern slang.”

Gilgamesh flipped through the pages before tossing it out into the water, without asking Arthur first.

“Well, what about the rest of these then?”

“I don’t know… I like reading about you.” Arthur admitted bashfully. “All these relationships you have with your best friend, the kings… it feels like—”

He stopped there.

“Yes, Arthur?”

“Forget it. I just liked how they drew you.”

Gilgamesh knew that was absolutely not the end of it, and as he flipped through the pages, he wondered what was going through Arthur’s head. All of these doujinshi had him as a romantic interest to the other characters. Was Arthur jealous? … did he have a reason to be?

“Arthur—”

“I’m just glad you’ll have so many people you can rely on when I’m gone.”

Arthur’s presence in this universe was finite. The two of them knew that much, and it was probably a melancholy happiness that lead Arthur to realize that once he was gone, Gilgamesh wouldn’t be alone. He’d have other holy grail wars where he’d have a chance to see his friends and companions, even if he had to fight to kill them, even if everything surrounding them was bleak and terrible and they were at the command of awful masters. Fujimaru Ritsuka was an outlier, a moment of peace even during the end of the world.

“Arthur, it’s true. You will never replace who these people are to me.”

If the words hurt Arthur, he didn’t let it show.

“But… neither can they replace you. Do you think a King lacks enough love to love more than one person? Then they could hardly be called a king at all. I understand your jealousy. I feel it every time you speak of your master. But… we are kings, and if our hearts are big enough to love all of Uruk and Camelot, then we certainly have room for lovers as well—no matter how long they are with us.”

“That’s…”

“I understand BB ruined our vacation together by taking my memories. It is a shame we didn’t spend more time together.”

“It’s not just that.”

“Hm…? Then, what is it?”

Arthur… averted his gaze. “I—it’s dumb.”

“If it bothers you, then it bothers me.”

“… even though we’re together, not one person made a book about us. They just made books about you and other people and Merlin made one of me and him just to make money. I kind of wish I could’ve seen one with me and you and how other people imagined us.”

Gilgamesh suddenly felt a pinprick of annoyance. He hadn’t even thought of that! But… to be fair, he wouldn’t have thought about any of the books in particular while his memory was gone.

“Arthur. I’ll be extending our visit here for another day. I have to go do something but promise me you’ll wait for me.”

Arthur looked at him, nodding. All of this hadn’t put him in the mood for some wacky adventure, but if Gilgamesh wanted to go on one—

Well, godspeed.

\--

Gilgamesh dragged Osakabehime by the hood to her tablet.

“You. I’ll forgive the fact that you kept a dakimakura of me in your room in Chaldea if you start drawing, now.”

“Draw what?”

“Draw me and Arthur in a doujinshi. You have one night to do it. You’ll be compensated…”

“You’re going to put me in zetsudespair, I already worked on a doujinshi for Jalter and company!”

“I’ll get you assistants. Just make it… cute, but in character… and with a good ending.”

\--

Oui was a harder sell, but Gilgamesh knew how to win her over. Opening the gates of Babylon, he revealed treasure upon treasure of paints, pigments that were lost to time with the extinction of certain plants, rarities in their own type. Practically drooling at the chance to use them, she immediately took on the job.

“Y’just need backgrounds ‘n stuff, right? I can do that, sure…”

“Just lighten the load on Osakabehime and it’ll be fine.”

\--

Ritsuka volunteered before Gilgamesh could even get the words out.

“You want me to write a love story between you and Arthur, right? That’s… actually pretty easy to do. I see how you guys interact on the battlefield all the time. I can do something about that.”

“You have to make it perfect. A treasure that Arthur will never let go of.”

“Oof—tall order. Okay, okay, I’ll see what I can do.”

\--

The hotel room was packed with servants. Osakabehime sketching panels, then sending them to the inker, to the background artist, all while Ritsuka wrote a script and revised it as panels came out. It was ludicrous, but Gilgamesh passed over every draft with an A-OK. It was a simple script—a doujinshi about reincarnated lovers in the modern day, no grail wars or anything like that. Just two people living a happy life. The only thing Gilgamesh took issue with was that Arthur was made more dominant than him—and frequently edited that whenever Ritsuka tried to slip it in.

It wasn’t a perfect book. The story was a little cliché, with only hints of fantasy and magic in it, but he knew this was the kind of thing Arthur would like. Sending it to the printer, Gilgamesh flipped through the pages with a sense of finality.

“… it’s good enough, I suppose.” Everyone else practically wilted on the spot that their hard work was only given a ‘good enough’.

“I was so proud of it, too…” Osakabehime wilted against the table, two all-nighters finally getting to her.

“You’re really demanding, but y’all’re lucky the paint you gave me was worth it,” Oui added. “Can I have a copy?”

“Me too.”

“Me as well!”

“This is just for Arthur, why do you want copies?” Gilgamesh quipped.

“Because… truth is, I never understood why that guy tolerated you, but in making this, I kinda wakari masunderstand… guys with big egos are hella sugoi once they undergo character arcs.”

“Yeah, like, Arthur can do better, but the script Ritsuka wrote made me understand why you two get along so well.”

“I’ll ignore that first part out of the graciousness of my heart. Here, you can each take a copy. A ServaFes exclusive.”

\--

It was just a matter of finding Arthur, now.

With the book in tow, Gilgamesh sought him out, eventually finding him at one of the mini bars on the beach. He wasn’t drinking anything, it just seemed like he was lost in thought.

“Finally!” Gilgamesh said, triumphantly. “Here you go.”

He handed the book to Arthur, who gave it a curious glance.

“ ‘Remembering You’ ? And it’s…” Aside from the title, it seemed to feature the two of them, in a beautiful watercolor painting.

Gilgamesh stayed silent as Arthur read the book quietly. It was a story of two reincarnated lovers who were once great kings from different eras (subtle) finding each other in the modern world. The friends they had made also made appearances, not a single one left out. Even the servants Arthur had met in his previous Holy Grail War were featured. It must have taken a lot of work, but it depicted a happy ending.

“We might not get this in real life, we’re servants, after all—but for a book, I think it does the job well.”

Arthur might have cried, but that would happen later. For now, he hugged Gilgamesh’s shoulders as tightly as he could. He’d read that book once a day for the rest of his time in Chaldea, and after…

\--

Arthur was in another desolate world. A beast of ruin once walked here, reducing it to rubble. He was yet again too slow to make it, but he still wouldn’t give up his pursuit.

In the shade of one of the buildings, Arthur sat down to take a break. From within his armor, the only suitable pocket he had, he took out a crumpled book that had endured traveling for a long time. Chaldea was no more than a distant memory, and without this book, he might have forgotten several of the faces depicted in it.

Those happy times, those happy memories.

Gilgamesh was right. He’d never get what was in this book, but just looking at it restored him in some ways. It gave him a certain joy that few people would find happy rather than heartbreaking.

A memory of love that would not go away, and the hope that it might return.


End file.
